What is up with all the Drama lately? First, you've got spies running around poisoning spies. And now it's spreading to your tennis? Is nothing sacred in your society? Oh yeah, tell us about the toilet seats again. That's, like, totally bizarre.
Look...
1) You've got the ongoing saga, and investigation, of your star player Nikolay Davydenko, who may, or may not have (wink, wink) fixed a match against Martin Vassallo Arguello in August.
2) Tommy Haas' camp is reporting that Haas underwent medical tests on Friday in New York. All because he may, or may not have (wink, wink) been poisoned in Moscow during the Davis Cup semifinal between Germany and Your Guys. May we remind you who won?
3) May we also remind Patrick McEnroe and his team to watch their coffee intake throughout the final which begins Nov 30. We do NOT want you looking like this ever again.
P.S. We're sorry to inform you, Mr. Putin, but your request to be head linesman during the final has been denied. However, we do have an honorary Ball Boy position available.
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